A New Dream

How many people in this world feel lonely inside?

Why is it so easy to love but it's so hard to feel loved?

What does it really mean to be rich or poor?

How does our inner faith in a higher power impact our relationships?

Over the last few years, I've attempted to answer many of these questions.

Thus far, this is what I've learned about myself:

The more I love, the stronger my faith becomes...

The stronger my faith becomes,
the easier it is to love...

I believe love and faith are bound together within the spirit of all souls. Despite the long shadows of hatred covering parts of our world, love and faith will one day prevail over the darkness...

This simple BLOG was created to share a few daily thoughts and feelings from a small country village in Thailand. Also, it's my story about a brief moment in time that changed my life forever. As time passes, I'll reveal more about myself and my inner dreams.

While I'm not a rich woman, I live a rich life...

Some of the photographs on this BLOG were taken with my cell phone. Other 35mm film & digital images were shot and developed by a very dear friend. In the future, I'll post more images from my countryside home and my recent travels to Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam. To make things easier for my return visitors, I've number each POST with a page number.

Until tomorrow, may the joy of life fill your heart with the warmth of a new morning sunrise...

Oun

Page #1

The Factory

After my father died, I moved to Bangkok to find a job and somehow help support my family. At the time, for an uneducated 15 year old girl moving to a big city, I really didn't have many employment options.

Shortly after I arrived, with the help of an aunt, I started working in a clothes factory. Looking back, I really didn't have time to mourn my father's death. Even though his body had left this earth, I knew his powerful spirit would always rest inside my heart. My father was a good man. He did everything to take care of our family.

In Thailand, the life of a farmer is a hard one and the years of working under the sun took its toll on his body.


So, once I started my new beginning in Bangkok, for the next ten years, I had a very simple life. Each day, I would leave my small one room apartment and walk down the same city street to work.

Sitting behind a sewing machine making button holes for blue jeans, I tried to dream of a better life for myself and my family. Every month, I sent money home to help pay for my brother's school.

Over the years, as one day turned into the next, dreams of love were quickly replaced by thoughts of making money.

A real Prince Charming falling in love with a 26 year old factory girl only happens in the movies...


Page 2

Becoming a Woman

When does a girl become a woman?

During my late teenage years, as my body continued to develop and grow, I never stopped seeing myself as more than just a simple country girl.

Each time I looked into the mirror, my body's physical changes never overshadowed my youthful innocence. Besides, what man would ever see me as anything more than just an uneducated country girl working in a blue jeans factory?

Look, I'm not stupid. My romantic options were limited. Five years ago, it would have been easy to marry a farmer from my hometown.


My older sister did and she now has three boys and a girl. Even though life's hard, I know she's happy. Here's a picture of her smiling from inside of her small store.

Could a man...or should I say would a man...ever learn to love all of me?

As I develop into a woman, I wondered to myself if my heart and soul would ever find true love. While I had lost my virginity several years ago, for a very long time, sex remained a distant part of my life.

It would take an American man named Peter to change my entire view of my inner self and a now fully developed body...


Page 3

Long Journey Home

In September 2005, after eleven years of living and working in Bangkok, I moved back to my hometown. These days, I spend most of my time working in the garden and helping my mother around the house.

Also, I continue to study English.


Here is a picture of my older sister and her new baby...

It felt strange moving back home. On later pages, I'll write more about all the life changing details surrounding my long journey home.

Indeed, one of my favorite quotes in English comes from a song I heard on the radio:

"Every new beginning comes from some other new beginning's end."

I am now living a new beginning with my mother.



One of these days, with time, I'm sure all my dreams will somehow come true.





Page 4